break-uprating-2.5I didn't hate The Break-Up, but it's still a turd (albeit it a turd that isn't THAT painful to watch; I mean, I gave it like a 2.8 out of 5. So, yeah). First, it's billed as a romantic comedy... But there's really few things all that funny about it. I really hate it when I'm told in a preview that a movie is one thing and turns out to be another.

What's it about? Here, read this Wikipedia link.

Done? Cool.

Yeah, I'm lazy. But this is a "nutshell review". What did you expect? A parade of what's best in writing and the English language?

Anyway, yeah, it's not all that funny, though it does touch on all those things that many couples fight over. Mr. Speck says that this movie could be re-titled The Harpy and the Douchebag, and that pretty much sums it up. Though Aniston and Vaughn play their parts well, the people they play kind of suck. Vaughn's less so. Jennifer Aniston's character is a total idiot and it's difficult to sympathise with her ass at all. OKay, well I can sympathise with her ass-- Hey, is my wife gonna read this?

So, it's not very funny and the main characters are written to be like scraping ones fingernails against a chalkboard. Seriously, Nancy Spungen would have been nicer to watch as a character. No offence meant to Aniston, as I actually like her acting. But the Vaughn character is better off without this bag of crazy.

(Put. The. Rock. Down! So I like Aniston... what? WHAT?)

Vince Vaughn also does an admirable job with such a dismal script (which he helped write, tragically). Even if this film was adverted as being a slightly cheeky romantic drama, I think I would still pan it. On the bright side was Jon Favreau's bit. A great charcater to be sure... until this part at the end where he drones on and on about hurting someone and such; it really doesn't need to be in there. Though the part is good, it really belongs in another movie. Jason Bateman also pulls off a great role.

And that's another thing. The pacing in this film is terrible and it has certainly been edited by drunk circus mice.

I bet those damned mice have a union.

Um... There's really not much more to say. This film isn't an atrocious affront to art and humankind like, say, Ultraviolet (damn you to hell, Kurt Wimmer, damn you to hell), but it certainly isn't all that great either. Almost or merely okay is a pretty spot on description. There are some great parts in this flick, but they're tied together with garbage bag ties to make up the greater whole. That's why I was so dissapointed. It could have been a great movie. ARGH!

The Break-Up stars Vince Vaughn, Jennifer Aniston and Jon Favreau. The director who should be caned is Peyton Reed. The writers who should spend a little time in a Turkish prison are Vince Vaughn, Jay Lavender and Jeremy Garelick.

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